It can be easy to fall off the path and follow false prophets whose roads twinlke with light where fools gold glistens more brightly than that which is pure. Shiny metal that will lose its lustre, that will dull and fade with time, whose worth was but an illusion. For a while you cling to it for you cannot see the gold that is already there. It may have its own value for gives you something for a moment – a break from the pain you feel inside, and the hope you need to continue on. But when it burns out you find yourself a long way from the path you were on, the one that was meant for you. You cannot see it through the forest,do not know that it continues just over yonder hill and you want to turn back from where you came. And you are no longer sure – how do you tell the difference between illusions and that which is pure for you have been fooled too many times before, and have given up, changed directions when the path is just around the corner. You are tired, empty-handed, and can barely stagger on. But you put a foot forward, take a breath, and continue on with the all the faith you can muster, and find yourself back on the path.
Lost Keys on THE search
November 14, 2009 at 5:10 pm (Uncategorized)
Tags: awakening, growth, panic, searching, spirituality
There are times in the journey in life where all seems lost and as much as you seek you cannot find the path. The search can become more frantic and desperate, but what you were searching for eludes you. And you get tired, and wonder what it was all about.
At times the search is like the lost object that sits right in front of your face – the set of keys on the counter that somehow you cannot see, so you embark on a frantic search. The keys are right there, where you left them, behind the bag of groceries you just set down. The bag would be so easy to move, but no you do not look there.
Instead, you search your pockets, your purse, under the pillows on the couch, your dresser, the chair, anywhere, but you cannot find them. Panic sets in, a freeze to your brain, and your hyperventilate, tension increasing, mind a blur, in desperation you open the fridge and check the door, into the freezer and under the peas, the medicine cabinet, behind and in the garbage, anywhere they just might be. You cannot sit still. you cannot go out. Where are they? You pace around, cushions scattered on the floor, drawers unturned, as they sit waiting for you on the counter.
You take a deep breath after a stream of tears – the groceries you say. You pick up the bag and empty its contents, not looking behind – over towards the counter where they are now in plain view. You check the produce, the carton of eggs, almost dropping them on the floor.
The telephone rings. You take the call. Your life is over. You break the date. Flop in front of the TV and mope about your night – the chance for fulfillment you just gave up. You stare blankly at the screen, seeing nothing, all a blur, the voices merge into one another becoming background static, but finally you sleep.
The restlessness, the tossing and turning cease as the channel goes off the air, racing dreams become still, and you become silent within, entering that other zone. That zone where all is clear and you are at peace.
Dawn breaks through the windowpanes and you awake. You stretch the body, take a deep breath and saunter into the kitchen. You glance over to the counter, and see the keys. On the counter in plain sight for all to see. They were there all along. You take them in your hands, a tear drops from your eyes as you wonder just what was it all about, and you smile. And walk outside. And you smile.
What we are searching for is often already there, in front of our faces or within ourselves if we would take a look, if only we could see. Breathe and smile.
Give Thanks Each Day
November 10, 2009 at 11:16 pm (Uncategorized)
Tags: awakening, darkness, gratitude, life, light, spirituality, Thankfulness
Years ago, when all hung heavily around me I read about a simple tool and decided to try it for a while. It was to write down 10 things each day that i was thankful for. At first it seemed next to impossible for what i saw were shortcomings and problems and i found it difficult not to criticize or add a but… At the beginning i would have to force myself and delve inside to find 10 good things. I would not know what to be thankful for and would go for the obvious, the food i ate, the bed i slept in, a sunny day, a public restroom when i desperately needed one. And i often did it without feeling, like the thanks we give to customers when we are working a cash register or when someone opens a door in front of us. At times, when i drew a blank and wrote down those things that i have been told to be thankful for i felt i was telling a lie and wondered it i were really an ungrateful soul. But i persevered and continued to write the words on paper and slowly i began to feel thankful and blessed.
At first i would feel grateful for some of the grand experiences or things – a spectacular sunset, a majestic mountain, a gift from a friend, an unexpected chance or an answer to my prayers. And then i began to feel thankful when something appeared after an absence or a loss – a warm bed and dry socks after camping in the rain, good health after getting over a cold or a flu, trees flowering in the spring, income and a job after being unemployed and broke, a call from someone after spending too much time alone, time alone after being surrounded by people. For each of these and many more things i was grateful and recognized it – a first – but then i often became blase, took them granted and even began to grumble about the very thing i had been thankful for. And then i would forget to write down 10 things each day. But the lesson came back to me, and i would remember to give thanks each day once again. I finally learned how and it changed my vision of the world.
On those days where the light shines upon us and all those around and we float lightly upon the earth, it seems a simple task for we know there is much to be thankful for – our loved ones, be they near or far, people or pets, a kind word, a blue sky or clouds above, a good book or movie, a conversation overheard, the beauty of a street we walk down or of another’s face, a flower or a leaf on a tree, a parking spot, peace, joy - the list can be endless.
But on those days where we “just know” that the entire world is conspiring against us, it can be tough – and it is on those very days when all we want to do is grumble that it is the most important to remember to do so – to add thanks to our grumblings. Sometimes we are forced to come up with something - anything. A simple smile from a stranger, that loved one who is presently driving us nuts, a bed to sleep in, food to eat even if it is just rice, potatoes or peanut butter sandwiched and we want for more, for that meal over at the next table. If it is pouring down rain upon us or we are shivering cold, remember the days when the sun shone endlessly and we prayed for rain or a break to the heat. If we were stuck in traffic, we can be thankful for the road, the car or transit, that we have somewhere to go. Be thankful for that flower, even if it is but a dandelion, for the bird, even if it is a crow, seagull or pigeon, or the insects that buzz around for that is life. The sun, the moon, the stars above, though they may be obscured, we know they are there. If nothing else seems to work, we can be thankful that we can write 10 things down, the we have a pen, pencil or keyboard, the ability to read and write, eyes to see, fingers to use and that we are alive.
ur By thanking each day we remember to be grateful, not only on the good days, or when we get something or someone after an absence or a loss but all the time. It can show us what we truly value, and shine light on what we often overlook. It make us feel more alive. And slowly, we may remember to pause and truly give thanks throughout the day.
For that simple tool i am thankful, for it helped teach me to be grateful and to open my eyes to the beauty of the world. Yes, there are days where i still grumble and complain, but i remember that light is there, and hopefully, i shine it through, even just a bit.
Thank You!
And in doing so i reframed my vision and my focus.
My Daily Insights
November 9, 2009 at 9:51 pm (Uncategorized)
Tags: awakening, growth, light
At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.
Albert Schwietzer
I receive quotes like this every day through www.mydailyinsights.com. They come to my inbox and I glance at them each day, and at times it is just that. Occasionally i just hit delete and do not read them at all. But they keep on coming and for that i am glad. For sometimes, often when i am least expecting it or most in need they truly speak to me and tell me what i needed to hear at the moment or provide the insight to something i am mulling over. At times they just make me smile.
And they are one of the many forms of kindling i gather into my life. The small things that can feed the fire, and provide the material needed to start it up again when it is burning low. And while we focus on the logs that will endure, at times we need the kindling as well – a good book, music, a brief meditation, a good stretch or movement of some sort, the right food, a nap, a kind word, a hug, the many tools that help us along the path. While they in themselves do not make a lasting flame (unless they are our logs), they can help it along, provide the spark. And for these i give thanks too.
The journey begins
November 3, 2009 at 8:19 pm (Uncategorized)
Tags: awakening, growth, journeys, life
You look out through the door and towards the path that leads you onwards in the journey through life. You take a step forward, looking towards the light.
For a while the terrain might be rocky with mountains to climb with uncharted paths as you leave the familiar behind. All that you once knew slips away and you find yourself alone. After a while you cannot turn back though comforts tempt you with the illusion of safety in the net. But the stream that you crossed only yesterday has become a raging river with the rains that brought you down and tempted you to crawl on back. For now the river is churning and impassable.
So you journey forward, forget the temptation to camp where you are, waiting for the river to subside so you can run home, or to find away around or over, expending the energy needed to propel you on, building a raft, a bridge, a something, to take you back to the familiar. Do not stop, give into the temptation for the journey is long and the mountains beckon.
On some days you will traverse many miles feet floating above the ground. On others you will struggle to take a step as you cope with the elements – the blazing sun or the chilly rain – wanting to collapse. Take the time to rest for a while, but remember the journey, and remember that even a tiny step is movement along the path.
On the journey, you will find others along the way. Some who will join you for just a brief moment, others who will stay for a long time or until the end. Some you will re-encounter in many places and other who will try to lead you astray. Rejoice in them for they too join your quest.
Follow your own light, for you will be tempted to take the sun’s of another as your own. As glorious and radiant as their sun’s and stars might appear, know that they are theirs to guide them and your path might be different. At times you might again find yourself alone and feeling like you don’t belong as others walk upon their way. Don’t hold on in a desperate grasp, attempting to block their paths, or turn your back or stomp off in anger and resentment, but wish them well, rejoice in the times you shared, smile and be on your way.
There will be those who try to convince you that their path is the only way, that there is but one road. Follow your heart, it will guide you true. It can be scary for so many have given up when the nights are long, when fog or clouds block the sun. They will try to convince you that this is it, the best we can hope for on this plane of existence. They do not understand why you struggle on for the road can be lonely and the pitfalls can be deep, but you must keep on trekking before you fall asleep.
There are some who have found their home, they will call you and you will be tempted to call it your own. You may visit and linger for a while, and in their brightness you may start to smile, but if the calls start whispering and begin to scream, remember that you are but a visitor and follow your dream. Appreciate their hospitality with gratitude, but do not overextend your stay.
We all will find our home, that which lays within. When you have found a place to be for a while, open your doors to those on the path, take them in and shine your life through.
Our journeys may be internal or external, they may cover vast terrain or only a short distance for each of our journeys is unique for life itself is a journey .
